I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Can I color on your dick again?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
