You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
