So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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