Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
