Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
