GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
