I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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