is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
