Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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