So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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