what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
tell your sister to shave her snatch
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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