I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
