The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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