brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
