she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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