So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
