i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
