Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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