Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
