I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize