This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
