Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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