Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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