This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize