would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
we made out on top of his cat.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
