Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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