you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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