And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Randomize
