My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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