either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
