do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
