this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
