Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
