Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
