I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
