his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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