can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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