Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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