he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
His nipple licking is glorious
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
