no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
