He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
