I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
