I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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