tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
