no, he came in my armpit
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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