shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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