Don't you send me to vm
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Randomize
