Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
