check it out our google latitudes are spooning
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
