No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
